What your online dating profile is really telling me.

Recently a close friend of mine (who shall remain nameless) and I decided to give the whole online dating thing a shot. So we set up profiles on a few different sites to see what was out there. For my part, I was mostly curious about how the whole online courtship thing works. Let me tell you, I have not been disappointed!

I have already spent some hours of enjoyment perusing online profiles and making some critiques. Here are some of my interpretations of profile postings I have seen for your enjoyment!


"I enjoy watching Grey's Anatomy." = You are secretly a woman.

"I'm really funny and have a great sense of humor." - Says who? If you're funny, say something funny. Don't tell me how funny you are, that's not humorous.


"I don't think a person can be described in a few paragraphs. If you want to get to know me, send me a message." = You have nothing interesting to say for yourself and are hoping your picture will be enough to attract someone (spoiler alert: it won't be).


"I am not book smart, but I am street smart." = You are illiterate.


"I can't stand people who are fake or dishonest." = You have real trust issues.


"I'll tell you later about my spirituality." = You're not religious.



You are wearing sunglasses in all of your pictures.  = You smoke a lot of weed.


You took your picture in the bathroom mirror with your phone. = You are a slutty 14 year old girl at heart.


You use the wrong "to" "too" or "two" more than once. = You never read the language you speak.


These are just some of the observations I have made. I'm sure there will be more to come :)